the spaces between

as we scroll down the screen there are spaces between the links that are there when i feel something is missing, when i feel i've done more writing outside of my blogs that is not copied and pasted in my blogs or recorded for posterity or memory anywhere... stuff i might write offline, on paper... or stuff i might write on websites as comments or articles that i simply do not copy for my files or blogs (usually because i am wandering and focused on the thoughts inspired wherever i am and sometimes copying and pasting interrupts those thought streams and so... some stuff is left out)... so when i feel stuff is left out of this record of writing, this table of contents, i skip a line and that blank line lets us know there was more than meets the eye here in this list of links to the writings i've left on the web... and i mention it not not only as an explanatory note, but also, for better or worse, because this reminds me of one of the deepest truths forming the core of my personal philosophy and perspective in this life...

if you do not understand my silence
you will not understand my words

i know you are out there

and i appreciate you...

yes, for the rest of you stopping by to this table of contents (toc) of most of the pages i put on the web (still don't link all the comments i leave here and there, but most of the blogs and rhymes and babbles and other writings i upload are listed here), there are people out there who stop by often, even daily, to check on my latest words (and some remember the written gardens)... for them (that's you too ya know), i try to keep this toc going... the recent spaces between titles in the monthly posts below indicate a day or days going by between listing a title and that indicates something might be missing, but i am doing my best to get to the toc file and update as often as possible... knowing it matters to you makes it matter even more to me... thanks...

keep in touch, or just read... someday i hope we sit across from each other again, or maybe the first time, and share a few more moments of this life in spoken words and shared experiences... until then, or even if we never meet, i hope the words i leave floating around here and there are worth your time :)

take care of yourself, i care and you are worth it :)

the long and broken road

lots of breaks and disconnects in october and november and december
and it may be time to reconcile this once again...
i never was much good at wanting to keep track of time...

the long and broken road that leads me back to your door
is a bit of begged borrowed and stolen words that rhyme...

it's an old song you must recognize
and remember
to understand
(icywtk)

December 2011

(private)
doritos for dinner

morning catch up
never enough time
timing is a lot
so what's new?



(private)
still love you

today was tomorrow yesterday, ya know?

someday, no really, someday

just for the record
arriving home
primal daily philosophy lesson 1
fun
(private)
lols and alases
sense
everdream
i coulda sworn i had a blog for bowling
reports of constipation have been
(private)
time running out on the weekend

(private)
alases and laughter
botts theory
(private)
blessed are the onces who remember to feel
give and give some more

too much fun, not enough time
enjoying myself















huh?




sleep must

number eleven number eleven number eleven

sites i saw #261

blessed are the ones who remember to feel

archives?

for no apparent reason

lols and alases


for no apparent reason

(private)
(private)
noticing
wow, really?
just in case
no really, what?
magic moments
getting stuff done
(private)
wonky ouchy
ouchy day

headache lingers
poor baby
(private)
lost along the way
cellophane
techincality
long and broken road
october 2011
november 2011
december 2011
the writer says: be
blessed
writing the record
once again, amazed



message from the future past:
cuz
pauses happen
on the
the long and broken road

(in time i shall repair the links above)

November 2011

kinda amazing
besides music
sleep dangit





wow, away






(private)






neglectful i have been
(private)
obviously, blah blah blah
(private)

(private)

yes, i know (with or without emphasis)


words written
linkages


(private)

softball weekend
gmorning
resting between games
more please
(private)
loving the fun
the morning after

(private)
fb comment
(private)
home again, no ring
fb comment
(private)
(private)
not enough time
sleep must
what happened





message from the future:
cuz
pauses happen
on the
the long and broken road

(in time i shall repair the links above)

October 2011

(private)
(private)
mostly newish
long fun weekend
sept 2011
poser
these blogging lives
where to put what
fact or fiction is relative to choice (private)
does it matter
body blows
vaguely remember
home a bit
flip a card, any card
blogpaths
red canyon
day off
commentarium
gotta sleep
beautiful morning
sites i saw 250
private blogging
tweet 289
tweet 290
tweet 291
catching up with myself
catching up with myself
sites i saw 251
and the changes
comments elsewhere
cleaning, laundry, facebook
back to the same
how to not sleep all night
tweet 295
how to not sleep
someone to love
tweet 297
(private)
comments elsewhere
(private)
comments elsewhere
the cat and the canary
alrighty then, sorta
cats
heading into a softball weekend
tweet 300
sometimes i wonder (softball)
home from work, off to play
fumbly bumbly win
silly, sleep already
to make it better
house call
let's get physical
sleep is good
pickles
ted turner broadcasting
home late, wake early
comments elsewhere
private blogs
sweet exhaustion
(private)
fatigue
sites is saw 252
sites i saw 253
sites i saw 254
comments elsewhere
workaholic
feeling alone
sites i saw 255
just the way it is
hydration
for no apparent reason (b sides) (new blog)
the ssaddest song you'll ever hear
this strange affair of life
sites i saw 256
strange threads
relaxing afternoon
good softball loss
sites i saw 257
comments lost and fb threads
sites i saw 258
sites i saw 259
sites i saw 260
just keep writing
comments elsewhere
oh come on now
skidaddling
home again (rinse, lather, rinse, and repeat)
softball on my mind
find myself awake
compartmentalizing
instance eh
work wakes me
not enough, but better than nothing
just relaxing

i will be back to update someday

(private)
(private)
wow, again
pauses
not just tv anymore
so i look at the blogger dashboard

message from the future:

cuz
pauses happen
on the
the long and broken road

(in time i shall repair the links above)

in case you want to know (icywtk)

feeling alone* (who remembers?)

(PS... if you came for the Meg and Dia mix, scroll down to the bottom of this entry...)

at this moment a poignant life change (upheaval level) is being processed and this is the public presentation of recorded moments and creative inspirations that are flowing as of this moment and the past week or so... i mean, of course there is (e)thereal, but thank goodness, there is still more...

awakish
almost home
singing songs
caught up, sorta
camping (alive in the moment)
sites i saw 198
sites i saw 199
sites i saw 200
sites i saw 201
and returning to a song of hope written when i was in the womb...

*alone

here i sit
so all alone
no one to talk to
no one to phone
i'll search to find
for there must be
a soul as lonely
looking for me

sad is heavy
vulnerability
want to be in love
looking for love
July 2011
sites i saw 197
sigh
fairy tale
wonder
blogs and other strangers
would you laugh?
the phone
stumblr at tumblr
days may blur for a while
remembering a bit

don't want to miss a thing
someday
why
love
lol lam laa

and in the end... thank goodness for the creativity (and the words and music and dreams and memories) that releases the emotions and with a little (or even lots of) creative license and imagination, turns the feelings into songs... and after years, it takes me back to the land of the mostly dead (though at least for the moment, not quite inspired to write there... perhaps later... or before, even... vulnerability is a delicate precarious balance, after all)...

but i love the creativity imagination can find in the emo :)

and finally for the moment, as i put this entry together, look what pops up on my phone... not just a person, but a place so well timed as to blow me away if i wanted it to... thank you universe (and dia)

... icywtk... sneeze... (seriously? yeah... just listen and feel :)

yeah, in case you wanted to know...

once

once there was a way...

to get back home... word.

once upon a time
i made a promise to myself
i gave a promise to myself
i said that love will never end
and i will always be a friend
and i will always stay in touch
and i still want to this much

beyond a dream
and just once
to share the understanding
to share everything

once

so i continue writing every day
no matter what the world may say
no matter how or why you're here
or even if no one is there
the words will be
the thoughts will be
eternally

beyond the printed page


here, here, and here...

here, there, and everywhere... word.

May 2011

four stars?
work and tennis
april 2011
sleep
sometimes i feel so lonely
wasn't here, was i?
not noticed
sleeped
so little time again and yeah, again
some people work for money
sleep soon, wisdom says
sites i saw 139
sites i saw 140
sites i saw 141
sites i saw 142
sites i saw 143
overbusy
i really should have slept
listening
well ok, there is the rub
back-up
at your mercy
home late
home late again
(private)
long time
dis-connections
the irony of words
sort of catching up
sites i saw 144
kinda bummed
slow browsing
sites i saw 145
botts
serious sun, softball, and fun
every rug i've known
every rug i've known
quick shot from wherever
should have slept again
you missed it again
whatdisay
nowhere
nothing
circimcision, anyone?
freethinkers
love spades
before i go anywhere else
true american way
2012 report and then some
challenges and loneliness
not my day
alright then, again
sites i saw 146
sites i saw 147
aloneness feeling stronger
relaqtive ends
relative ends (who will pay the rent?)
and in the end
commercial destruction
lonely, but (to be with me)
always hope
pathos, anyone?
beauty
another weekend gone
another week begins again
happiness is a gas gas gas
major pigging out
worst best
indispensible me
watching the bulls
da bulls and dia
should be sleeping, right
just cuz i like her
later
i wasn't feeling this way
not so much
car troubles
dream
facing choices
don't buy a car in orlando, fl
cars
(private)
wear sunscreen, and other advice
what was i thinking?
the motion picture
the 4am car alarm
car search
tennis and cleaning
softball and cooking
games and yummy
good morning sunshine :)
sites i saw 148
sites i saw 149
sites i saw 150
sites i saw 151
jefferson would have danced too
nothing night
technology sucks
sexology
once in love
playlist
gotta buy a printer
@twitter

no new car
more to life
not that bad
pasta for all
moods, dudes
it's all about the flippancy
surely, don't call me bullsugar
squeezing it out
praise the chips and pass the ketchup
it might have been grand
sites i saw 152
sites i saw 153

so much more than words

between the lines, beyond the titles, within the words, the dreams continue and the promise remains kept...

forget?... don't forget

sleepless still

miles to go before i sleep
still have promises to keep
emotions intense and deep
miles to go before i sleep

keeping a promise

it is about keeping a promise, all the words, all the time, all the energy put into this devotion to typing a few words here and there as daily as possible, it is alll about keeping a promise...

even if no one ever knows...